; simplicity-

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

I realised how childish I was. Read my old posts. Read Heidi's post scolding me or something that i copied to my email 2 years ago.

I must admit that I have changed from 2 years ago. I have changed from what I was at PCPS. My dislike for my CCA, I have learnt to forcefully accept it. I have spent my past 15 years with change. Hated by nearly everyone, I was quite snobbish, a show-off as well, without me realising.

At least, I am proud to say that I have changed. No longer my previous self, definitely. One whole round of conflicts, hatred, and I have returned to what I was long before, listening to others. Half of my life up to now spent revolving around a circle. P6 after PSLE, I found it more tiring after PSLE than studying for it. At a time when everyone was free, happy, having fun, I was finding it worse. I wanted exams to come back. Really depressing. I never truly recovered from that, no one would give me a second chance.

How childish I was. Going around making enemies for no good reason. Not invited to anything of the class. I want to contribute, regardless of how late it is, to 6B 08. With the current quarrels and conflicts that haven't be resolved, let go of your grudges. It's easy, ask yourself why are you hating one another. A neutral party, I hope I am today, if I can help in any way.

* meeh-
8:14 AM

Sunday, February 6, 2011

This year sec 3 already.

So much appears the same, yet just as much appears different.

Yep got different class, got different teachers, its a different year.

But still, same attitude, same problems, same mindset, same hatred.

One year past already.

Gosh I'm still stuck here

I hate it so much

Not that I wanted this to happen

Not that I liked it in the first place.

Tomorrow got school

Break end le :(

Long day some more

* meeh-
12:18 AM

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Today is teachers' day celebration. The celebration was not as bad as I imagined it to be. IT ENDED AT 9:30AM THATS THE BEST THING. muhahaha. Then I took my time to go pcps, first I had breakfast at Burger King since there was the $2.95 set. After that go downstairs to $1.05 shop buy random stuff. The seaweed and sweet there quite cheap leh, cost of three tubes of sweets there = 1 tube of sweet in seven eleven. Spent about $4. Then I got damn angry with Popular for opening so late. Hmph I wanted to buy teachers day gift. So I decided to queue at Koi for bubble tea, short queue some more don't needa wait that long as during NYFF (i remember waiting for 20 minutes at least).

So I waited for the interval of one bus to finish bubble tea, then waited another interval since I couldn't find somewhere to throw. U know la, since I was wearing uniform I cannot do anything that is ungracious, later they put on Stomp and don't pixel my face then how you want me to go outdoors. Lose my mian zi. And I only went to PCPS at 11.30am after my constant delaying. I reached canteen then I keep scolding jia for not guiding me around her school during NYFF. Don't know why she run in the first place. Then she keep threatening. Bleh she 恶人先告状, promise to guide me around in the end never. Anyway we all met li lao shi and we took photos with him. Then he tell me stop growing haha. And we continued seeing people come and they left for lunch at I-donno-where just before Janet arrived. Hmph. We were considering have lunch all together. Then kai juin come tag along with us until we managed to shake him off some how. Yun yi kept on getting scared of Jonan haha. Same bus some more, then she keep explaining that he CMI. So later we reached central at like 3+pm !@#$ damn late le that time, they say want to eat ichiban but then no more lunch set thanks to janet walking at waiting rather than running like Kelsey. All Janet's fault made us have to go to library since there was no movie we liked to watch at Eng Wah.

Then she went there keep sitting down around 200+ on the adult level since teen level all taken up le (bleh they shld put 21 or below there, just like for senior citizen corner 65 and above). At the adult level Yun Yi was finding for some geography book, and then out of surprise we stumbled upon books about sex. Then we all were laughing then later I went to search for some oil book which I borrowed later. While I was reading the book Janet very wu liao go take the books on sex and read, then the things inside were damn sick sia, some sex technique book ah? Then we kept on laughing and the funniest thing was that she borrowed the book in the end. HAHA maybe next time we shld go library again, comedy that's free, cheaper than arcade

* meeh-
7:08 AM

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Sian I went Japanese festival yesterday. Legs still aching now (a bit luckily, unlike on NYFF make my leg damn pain, back of my foot still had that small bruise.)

About NYFF, I reached at 3.30pm I think. Thanks to the school's bad phone reception (call jia like dunno how many times also cannot receive, wah lau) together with the poor utilization of the TV screens on the bus (they could have used it to show the bus station name right. zhen shi de), made me like 6km ahead wah lau eh. original distance was 10 km, then coz i duno whr NY is and coz i scared no return bus so I sat for longer and longer lor. And coz jia didn't freaking reply me coz of the poor phone reception. So I sat on the bus for like 22 km before reaching there, go back another 10 km so it's like 60% more time than I should have been on the bus. Well maybe I should not have bought koi cafe milk tea, I think it had already melted quite a bit when I reached there (if i bought for jia taking into account the extra 1 hour I spent finding her I think the whole thing entirely melted le.) And so sad Anyway yesterday went jap festival. Quite the same. Queues queues queues. I only know my legs ached

* meeh-
9:07 AM

Sunday, August 8, 2010

I don't like going for you, you desperately want to boot me out. Yet it is because of the external forces of reality that have stopped us from separating. I will combat these external forces and practice everyday. It no longer is a matter where I can say no, I will fight for my life back. You will no longer cripple me from my dreams. My dreams I will work towards them, you may be continuing hating me, that's who I am. In a matter of days I hope the miracle occurs, at least I've tried even if it didn't occur.

* meeh-
8:22 AM

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Haha chinese today was epic. There were three teachers who came in to observe how our teacher taught. (Dunno why they needed three, last time with lee cherh I think only one?). Then everyone's mood changed once the older lady who looks like mrs chor was saying 拿椅子 in some accent. The people around me were like complaining 'so authoritative', '!@#$'. Then tang lao shi was standing there to teach the flower poem. And I think no one played cellphone during that period and no one slept haha :). For me I was like randoming there, hope I don't get too much attention. After the three teachers got out some ppl raised the finger behind her. Then everyone was cheering when they got out. Then we were talking to the chinese teacher, then she say xie xie.

* meeh-
4:32 AM

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

When others are being unfair to you, why should you be fair to them? If they do not help you in times of need, go ahead and be daring enough to reject their lies. All a pack of lies.

Freaking unfair. They classify me with that person. Wow. Group work is more of a segregation between the elitist and the non-elitist. Now I am being classified right at the bottom. Amazing they still remember my grades from last year. Was I not contributing? Name when. You classify me with him. Fine. Go ahead. I will retaliate with all methods at all costs. Complain like I did in the past and make one whole group never able to enjoy higher authority.

Kicking me away precisely means that you all are discriminating me. The road seems hopeless. I am on the verge of complete collapse. I don't deserve this sort of treatment. This is just damn unfair. Kick me aside because you all think that I am an easy solution to the problem and that I shut up the whole time. freaking unfair. I will retaliate.

* meeh-
7:24 AM